dead legs, dead puppy

I made it through my 13 mile run yesterday. Barely. Friday night, I was so exhausted that Doug insisted I take a late afternoon nap. I woke up at 5:3o after a three hour nap. I slept alright that night and felt good Saturday morning. I woke up without an alarm at about 7:30 and got to the gym at 9:00. My goal for that run was a nine minute mile pace. I had done this successfully last Saturday with my 12-miler. I had two bottles of water and two Gu packets so I was good to go. The first few miles went by without a hitch. I felt really relaxed and comfortable. Around, 6 miles, I could feel myself began to chafe pretty badly and I think that messed with my mental game. By the 8.5 mark I hit a wall and just felt done. I really really wanted to just call it a day and say, "close enough." I tried to focus because I was really frustrated at this point and dropped my pace to a 10:3o mile. At 9.5 miles, I wasn't feeling any better, so I did the unthinkable and started to walk which I never never do during a run. I kept telling myself that at the 1o mile mark I would run the last three miles but not push it. At mile 1o, I began at 10:30 pace and by mile 12, I was back to my original pace to finish the run. This was the hardest long run I have ever done. I feel disappointed that I couldn't keep pace and had to walk a half mile, but I am glad I finished. My time was right around 2:08 or a 9:50 mile pace. About 10 minutes slower than I wanted to go. I am trying to not be too discouraged though because I have two months of training to go and this week I wasn't feeling that great. I think I am going to switch from water to Gatorade on my long runs because that is what will be available on race day. That may help. I may need to reevaluate when I eat the Gu as well. On the plus side, I feel pretty good today. I am sore, but its not too bad. I am thinking about pushing the pace on my shorter runs this coming week. Here is my training schedule this week:

Tuesday: 3 miles

Wednesday: 7 miles

Thursday: 4 miles

Saturday: 10 miles

Well, yesterday Erin and I introduced ourselves to some of our neighbors. We got on the subject of the dogs in our area. A ton of owners let their dogs have free reign of the neighborhood during the day. Our neighbor informed us that people have been known to abandon dogs on our street that they need to get rid of. I had wondered why our area had so many strays. As I was walking home, I kid you not, I found a dead puppy at the end of our property line near the road. Most likely it was a dumped dog that died of starvation or lack of medical attention. I am going to call animal control on Monday to see what our options are for our neighborhood and to remove the puppy. I don't know why it shocks me when I see such a blatant disregard of personal responsibility.

Later that day, I went to Wal-Mart and while I was in the check-out line, a mother and a young daughter were caught shoplifting. I could empathize (not justify) with someone in this economy shoplifting necessities like groceries, but their cart was full of Hannah Montana clothing, electronics, and dog food. It just makes my heart heavy when I think of the direction our society is heading. The saddest part is that those that want to change their lives for the better are often looking in the wrong places. For example, this morning our pastor explained that humanistic psychology teaches the source of change is "you." YOU can change if you really want to, YOU can do anything if you reach your full potential, etc. Our pastor described a search he did on Amazon.com for self-help. Amazon came back with a list of 97,000+ products. The point: there are so many because not one will work! On your own you can't change anything about your heart. You can quit smoking and things like that out of sheer will-power, or even change your environment, but you cannot be truly transformed without the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

Another reason most will not know true transformation is the legalism of religion. This is a huge problem that is turning a ton of would-be believers away from the truth. You are not transformed if you hold on to an external facade (religion). Rules are good and govern action, but right behavior is the result of a changed heart, not the cause. Rules and regulations do not = true transformation. Now, our pastor posed a very interesting question: Doesn't salvation by grace (instead of works) mean I can keep on sinning and not change? I have heard this question asked before so I was very interested in what he had to say. The Answer: No change ignores the purpose of Salvation. Jesus saved us from our sins. Therefore, we should want to sin less! No change ignores the means of salvation. We died with Christ on the cross and also raised again into new life. Our life should look new and different. No change ignores the nature of grace. The goal of grace is to kill sin because sin separates us from God and God loves us and does not desire this for us. And lastly, no change ignores our identity with Christ. Unity with Christ=true transformation. Great great lesson. I was taking notes like crazy as you tell.

I don't mean for these blogs to be so long. I may post one just for fun tomorrow. I hope everyone has a blessed, transformed week!